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love - Steven Cox | San Diego, CA

Steven Cox Life Lessons

44 Life Lessons on my Birthday

By Life Lessons, Motivational, My Writings 6 Comments

A couple weeks ago, I grew another year wiser. It was the big 44!

I don’t know if you’ve experienced this where, one day, you kind of wake up and realize you’re in the mid-part of your life. It’s surreal. It’s surprising. It’s life.

Honestly, I really feel wonderful. Life just keeps getting better and I feel more centered, fortunate, blessed, and happy than I’ve ever been. I guess time has a way of making things better.

This morning, I woke up and wrote down 44 things I’ve learned over the past 44 years. Things about love, work, drive, direction, purpose, health, and curiosity. Things that have become beliefs. Things that have shaped my view of the world. Things I hold as important.

I’m writing these so when life takes a downward turn, I can go back and remind myself of what’s important. But, perhaps you might find something in here as well that you can apply to your life to make it a bit more fulfilling. If that turns out to be the case, then I’d be a happy man to know I’ve helped you out in a small way.

Enjoy! I’d love for you to comment below and let me know what your favorites are:

Steven Cox Life Lessons

44 Things I’ve Learned in 44 Years.

 

  1. The value of life is not in what is owned, but what we experience, who we experience it with, and the quality of love we give.
  2. Live life in a way that makes a positive lasting difference on others and your environment.
  3. The air I breathe is borrowed.
  4. When considering happiness, set the bar low. Make it easy for you to find reasons to be happy.
  5. Practice kindness daily.
  6. We are allowed to make mistakes and still be awesome.
  7. Our happiness depends greatly on what we choose to focus on.
  8. We are all one.
  9. Meditate daily.
  10. Character is determined when no one is watching.
  11. There is a difference between looking at someone, and truly seeing them. Focus on the latter.
  12. If you randomly think of someone, stop for a moment and send them positive energy.
  13. Give love freely, for, it is infinite. Receive love openly. You are worthy of love.
  14. Instead of asking what your mate can do for you, ask if you have the character to be the man she needs you to be.
  15. Never stop touching.
  16. It’s OK to cry.
  17. A short, hand-written note is more meaningful than a text or email.
  18. Make a photo book of your friends, family, and events every year.
  19. Friendships must be cultivated, watered, and grown.
  20. At the next party you go to, make it a point to ask questions, be interested, and listen three times more than you talk.
  21. Travel Often. Let curiosity be your guide.
  22. Trade your time only for WOW!
  23. Dress up on Halloween
  24. Go see live theatre
  25. Every so often, only listen to new music for a week. It could be a new station, a new band, or a new genre that you normally woudn’t listen to. Get out of your routine.
  26. Take time to play.
  27. Discover the artist within you without judging him or her.
  28. Risk more than is comfortable. Take a step. Even when you’re unsure, step anyway.
  29. Exercise your body and mind 5 days a week.
  30. Your health matters more than your bank account.
  31. Every so often, do fruit, veggie, raw diets for a few days, and don’t drink during that time.
  32. Buy fewer things of higher value.
  33. Commit to taking full responsibility in every area of your life.
  34. People aren’t watching and talking about you as much as you think they are.
  35. Our greatest challenges yield the most beautiful memories.
  36. Money is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master.
  37. When you feel arrogance in yourself, ask what you’re afraid of.
  38. Surround yourself with people who play at things you have to work at
  39. Set stretch goals. The greatest value is not in what you accomplish, but the type of person you become while working on it
  40. Strive for excellence over perfection
  41. Many times, the race is won by those who keep running.
  42. You are not your work. It is a part of what you do, but it is not who you are.
  43. We never have another day to make this day meaningful, so spend more time working on things worth dying for.
  44. Love. Then, love more.

 

Forgiving

By Life Lessons, Love No Comments

I had a wonderful conversation a couple weeks ago with a good friend who is about 1,000 times more enlighted than I am. We spoke about life, love, joy, fear, and forgiveness. As we started speaking of forgiveness, I realized that I had some work to do here.

There was parts of me that were still pissed at people for a bunch of past reasons. One stole money from me. One tried to screw me over in business. One was dishonest. One was heartbreaking.

What came to light for me was that all of these past incidents were, well, in the past. The only place they were alive was in my head. Not in the real world – but in my head. And, if that’s the only place they were living, I could – in an instant – decide to put them to bed forever by learning how to forgive.

So, I decided to take his advice and work to let it go – to clear the space in my head that was being used up by past experiences that no longer truly existing in today’s world. Here’s what I wrote after one of my meditation sessions. It summarizes what I did and how I feel:

Today, the word ‘Forgiveness’ is what I worked on.

Today, I realized that if I had animosity towards someone, it was because I was choosing to hold it, not because of an act they had done.

In my heart, I forgave anyone i could think of that i was holding pain against.

I chose to get to a place of acceptance for them, realizing the only reason i felt pain and hurt was because i loved them – because they meant something great to me.

Instead of holding on to my perception of what I wanted from them, I choose to love them again.

I chose to accept them for who they are instead of requiring them to be someone they’re not. I chose to love, instead of waiting for an apology before I was willing to give love.

I learned I don’t need the apology. I only need to work on my own paradigm and filters on how i choose to view them.

I choose love. I choose peace. I choose forgiveness.

 

 

forgive-forgiveness-freedom

Make a Shift – Spend More Time on Things You Love

By Goals, Life Lessons 3 Comments

In our latest Mastermind meeting, rockstar motivator John Assaraf stated that he was dedicated to spending more of his time on things that he loves vs. things that are tolerable or downright a drag.

I made a visual representation that I think is applicable to everyone's life.

Spend more time doing things you love. This includes at work. Find jobs that fuel your natural talent and curiosity. It makes life so much better!

Spend Time

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55 Ways to Get More Energy Into Your Life

By Goals No Comments

Steven’s note: The original post is from a great site called Zen Habits and is edited by Leo Babauta. This is a guest post from Greg Go, co-author of Wise Bread’s new book, 10,001 Ways to Live Large on a Small Budget. 

If you’re tired all the time, a change in what you eat (diet) or
what you do all day (activity pattern) may be all you need to turn
things around 180°.

You won’t be able to do everything on this list all the time — you’d
tire yourself out trying to get more energy — but do try them all to
see which ones work for you and your schedule. Add a few of these tips
to your regular routine. Or mix them up to keep things interesting.

1. Change your socks for refreshment.

It’s an amazing trick. Bring a change of socks to work, and change
your socks midway through the day (say, after lunch). You’ll be amazed
at how much fresher you’ll feel. This trick is especially handy on days
with lots of walking — like during a hike or family outing to the
amusement park.

2. Rock out loud.

Whether you work alone or in a room with coworkers, a quick one-song
rock out loud session is an effective way to beat back exhaustion.

In a cube farm? Get everyone to sing along! The key is to choose a song that everyone can sing along with. (I like Kokomo.)
The energy boosting effect comes from bobbing your head and singing out
loud. One song, 3 minutes. That’s a quick boost of adrenaline that
lasts for a bit. You’ll be singing to yourself the rest of the never
ending project delivery night.

3. Get rid of the stuffy nose.

If allergies have your sinuses blocked, you may be feeling more
tired and cranky. An over-the-counter allergy medication should clear
up your sinuses (and your mind).

4. Work with your body’s clock.

There is a natural ebb and flow of energy throughout the day. We
start off sluggish after waking up, even after a solid 8 hours of
sleep. Our energy peaks mid-morning, and it’s natural to want a siesta
in the afternoon. We get a second spike of energy in the early evening,
followed by our lowest energy point just before bedtime. Once you
understand this natural rhythm of energy throughout the day, you can
work on the important tasks during your peak hours and avoid early
afternoon snoozefests (meetings).

5. Have a piece of chocolate.

Not too much, but if you’re going to have some candy, it might as
well be chocolate. We get an endorphin buzz from chocolate (not to
mention the energy boost from the slight bit of caffeine chocolate
contains). Dark chocolate has more caffeine than milk chocolate.

An afternoon snack of yogurt, berries, and nuts will provide the boost of energy to carry you through the day. Photo by lepiaf.geo / Flickr)

An
afternoon snack of yogurt, berries, and nuts will provide the boost of
energy to carry you through the day. Photo by lepiaf.geo / Flickr

6. Have an afternoon power snack.

A small healthy snack
that is low in sugar and has protein and/or fiber a couple hours after
lunch helps you finish off the day strong. Some suggestions:

  • mixed nuts
  • nonfat yogurt
  • apple and peanut butter
  • frozen berrie smoothie
  • trail mix
  • granola bar

7. Hit up the water cooler for inconsequential banter.

A little midday gossip and random banter is a great pick-me-up for
your tired mind. It works because it gets your mind on zero-stress
thoughts for a while. The mental break for just a few minutes will
revitalize you.

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