I had a wonderful conversation a couple weeks ago with a good friend who is about 1,000 times more enlighted than I am. We spoke about life, love, joy, fear, and forgiveness. As we started speaking of forgiveness, I realized that I had some work to do here.
There was parts of me that were still pissed at people for a bunch of past reasons. One stole money from me. One tried to screw me over in business. One was dishonest. One was heartbreaking.
What came to light for me was that all of these past incidents were, well, in the past. The only place they were alive was in my head. Not in the real world – but in my head. And, if that’s the only place they were living, I could – in an instant – decide to put them to bed forever by learning how to forgive.
So, I decided to take his advice and work to let it go – to clear the space in my head that was being used up by past experiences that no longer truly existing in today’s world. Here’s what I wrote after one of my meditation sessions. It summarizes what I did and how I feel:
Today, the word ‘Forgiveness’ is what I worked on.
Today, I realized that if I had animosity towards someone, it was because I was choosing to hold it, not because of an act they had done.
In my heart, I forgave anyone i could think of that i was holding pain against.
I chose to get to a place of acceptance for them, realizing the only reason i felt pain and hurt was because i loved them – because they meant something great to me.
Instead of holding on to my perception of what I wanted from them, I choose to love them again.
I chose to accept them for who they are instead of requiring them to be someone they’re not. I chose to love, instead of waiting for an apology before I was willing to give love.
I learned I don’t need the apology. I only need to work on my own paradigm and filters on how i choose to view them.
I choose love. I choose peace. I choose forgiveness.
